missing out

I'd like to host a dinner party about every other day. I think life is delicious, and I want to gobble it up in big bites, eating, drinking, reading, talking, traveling -- everything. I want everything. I'm hungry for everything, all the time. Bookstores make me ravenous, as do city streets and airports and glossy fashion magazines. So much to see, taste, touch, try, do. I can feel myself come to life, eyes open, taking everything in, fingers running over textures, ears pricked for sounds. I feel like life is so genuinely interesting, that there's so much to be tasted and tried and discovered.

We all have a kooky set of fears and loves that makes us do what we do. For me, I love experiences, and it makes me scared to think of missing out on anything at all. So that fear drives me and takes over my life, pushing me to do more, buy more, eat more, try more. But I don't want to be ruled by fears. There will be more life to experience tomorrow. And the next day, and the next day. And I don't have to be running after it all the time. Breathe, rest, practice the idea of enough. Practice the idea of living well, and a little more slowly. Practice believing that it will all still be here, waiting to be devoured freshly, after a good night's sleep.

Excerpt from Bittersweet by Shauna Niequist

Reminiscing and Resolutions

Some 2011 highlights:

I was accepted into The School of Theology as an Educational Ministry major.

Spending time in the sunshine with my beautiful bestie, Hannah. This wonderful girl is now engaged and I couldn't be happier for her! So glad she is my roommate and friend for life.

I finished my Individual and Family Development classes, which means I have successfully completed one of my degrees. I have been so incredibly blessed by these women and the impact they have had on my life the past few years.

My "little" brother graduated high school and joined me in Seattle, across town at Seattle U.

Spent gobs of time with this little man and his brother (and sister when she joined us in July). Love this family so much!

My lovely friend Lisa was married to her high school sweetheart in July and I was honored to be a part of her special day. Such a blessing to know her and the rest of the ladies in this picture.

After Lisa's wedding I came home to help with VBS at church. I led the Discovery Science rotation and had a fun week of crazy food focused science experiments. Mentos in Diet Coke- it's always a winner!

I met this sweet little lady baby, Joanna Faith.

Went on my first road trip back to school in MY car! It worked out so great that Chelsea was able to drive with me. I was blessed to meet her this year in EdMin classes.

Started interning at First Free Methodist and have loved every minute. I continue to be amazed at how much I love what I do.

Moved back on campus and started my senior year of college. I would be hard-pressed to find more amazing roommates than these ladies. Can't imagine life without them.

Had an amazing weekend when my best friend Sarah came to visit! I showed her all my favorite places in Seattle and we even went to a Colbie Caillat concert!

Not only did I meet this wonderful woman, but I get to live with her, and now celebrate the fact that she is engaged! I have been blessed by Esther from the start, and know that it was God who brought us together as the best of friends.

Celebrated my 21st birthday in style with my favorite kiddos at church. I wouldn't have wanted it any other way!

I was accepted as a Falconette and joined this women's service club at SPU. Every week I am amazed at how much I like spending time with each and every one of these women.

My best friends surprised me with dinner at PF Changs for my 21st birthday. Love them more than words can say.

Came home for Thanksgiving for the first time in 3 years. You forget how much family means until you're not around them.

Old friendships, new friendships, our last Tradition in the Loop, and now 3 of them are engaged! So much love.

Assisted with the Children's Christmas Musical at church. I am so proud of how hard these kids worked and so honored to work with such wonderful people.

Celebrated Christmas early with my roomies. French toast, presents, Big Bang, and cuddling on the couch- can't get much better than that.

The hemoglobin to my myoglobin :) Love this picture. And this girl. SO so much.

Alumni Soccer Game at WCS. Nobody has great friends like I do. Beyond blessed to come home to such great people who will always be there for me.

Kayla and Sarah. Life would not be complete without them.

Christmas with the monkeys. Love me some Lambert kids!!

Merry Christmas from Riverside.

Ended the year with a trip to the mountains with Kayla (and 11 others!). There are no words to describe this girl, my best friend for life. No matter how much time has passed, it's like nothing has changed. We will always be there for each other, and for that I am eternally thankful.

Wow, it has been quite the year. I think the recurring theme is that I am truly blessed. My life is filled with love and laughter, friendship and family. I have learned a lot in this past year, about who I am and where God wants me to be. I have gone from being in a relationship to being single, and am a better person for what I have learned. I have completed a 3rd year of college and started the last. I have spent multiple days at Disneyland and the beach. I have grown in more ways that I can count. My year has been busy, continuing work at NQACC , now teaching in the Toddler rooms; beginning an internship at First Free and earning priceless experience; applying to graduate in June; and biggest of all- deciding on staying in Seattle after graduation. I don't know where God will lead me, but I trust in his promises for my life. As long as I am in Him, I am where I am supposed to be.

Resolutions are always difficult for me. Here we go:

1. Think before I speak. Complain less and speak kinder words.

2. Limit my time on the Internet and facebook.

3. In conjunction with the last resolution, spend more time with people I care about.

4. Read 50 books and keep track of them.

5. Remember to find something to be thankful for every day.

6. Take more adventures in Seattle- new restaurants, parks, museums, and more.

7. Spend at least 2 mornings a week doing some sort of physical activity (more than just playing with kids at work!).

8. Continue to be open to what the Lord has in store for my future. Allow Him to open and close doors and give Him the control.

I'm sure I could come up with more, but I think that for now it's a good start.

Happy New Year!

Is it Thanksgiving yet?

November has FLOWN by! I feel like the more I cross off to-do lists the more I add to them. It's never ending. haha. I am very excited for a break from school, but I know that I also have a lot of work to get done over the next week. Praying I'll be able to get things done even at home.

Last night at church Pastor Blake shared stories of thankfulness and how we all have things to be thankful for- even small things that might seem silly. He shared 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18:

Be joyful always;

Pray continually;

Give thanks in ALL circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

This was such a good reminder to me that there is always something to be thankful for. We are not called to only give thanks when things are going well and everything is happy, but in ALL circumstances we are to give thanks. When its pouring rain and I've dropped my notebook in a puddle what can I give thanks for? That I have the ability to go inside and warm up and dry off; that I have legs that work to get me out of the rain; that I can afford an education; that I am able to put letters and words together to even write that paper; that I have access to water all the time and don't live in a desert... (you get the point). There was poster paper throughout the sanctuary and we were invited to write things we are thankful for. I started making a list of things that often get forgotten in my daily life.Things like safety, security, clean water, education, salvation, grace, warm clothes, clean bedding, a car with gas in it....the list really is never ending.

Continuing my November list of daily gifts/blessings/thanks from God:
8. drama-free roommates
9. professors and pastors who want the best for me
10. a job that allows me to rest when I'm sick
11. boyfriends who adore their girlfriends
12. Christmas shopping
13. children caring about others in need
14. roommates coming "home" after being gone forever!
15. sharing embarrassing stories with trustworthy friends
16. blessings words can't explain
17. Thanksgiving food made with love
18. surprises from my favorite people
19. Christmas sales
20. FM1 worship & dinner
21. the feeling of finishing a big assignment

In other news, my roomies surprised me for my 21st birthday with dinner at PF Changs. So fun!

My life would be incomplete without these ladies.

Back to Work

Well, Spring Break is over and it is back to the busy schedule that is my life. Don't get me wrong, I love to be busy and have a routine and know what I am doing every day (and week), but it is always nice to have a break with no schedule or anything that HAS to get done. I spent the past week and a half at home and really enjoyed every moment (even though it never warmed up like I wanted it to ha).

I have already finished up my classes for the day and I will say that I love being done by 12:30. Yes, I have to get up early, but if that's my biggest complaint for the day then I think I'm doing alright. Of course, I already have homework that needs to get started, work just called and asked if I could stay late, and then I have church tonight. You could say that Wednesdays are my busy days. :) But I'm thankful for all of it: the ability to attend classes, the chance to learn something new, an opportunity to use my new computer (!!), legs to walk on to get myself to class, a nice coat to keep me dry and warm in the rain, a job that pays me to do something I love, a chance to help out with the children at my church, and eventually a warm shower and bed to come home to at the end of it all. Since I have been reading One Thousand Gifts I have really thought more and more about the chances I have to be thankful, and I'm thinking of starting my own list of things that I can be thankful for.

Today I am thankful for life- new, old, and eternal.

"Let everything that has breath praise the LORD." Psalm 150:6