Thankful for the seeds.

Ch-ch-ch-changes are happening and I am choosing to be thankful. I am not the first person to admit to liking change or even welcoming it without a fight, but I am learning {finally} that change is a part of life and I can't do much to stop it. The first change is that summer is coming to a close. Boo. However, that means there are lots of wonderful things about fall coming....pumpkin spice lattes, scarves, boots, beautiful leaves, scented candles, my birthday, Thanksgiving, and eventually Christmas! Many stores already have their Christmas things out for sale, and while I think it is a little early, it does make me excited for my favorite time of year.

Changes are happening at work. We've just graduated 13 (mostly) potty-trained kiddos to the next classroom and are getting 9 (not potty-trained) new ones on Wednesday. I am preparing myself for the work that is ahead, but I'm excited for a fresh start and new kiddos who are excited to learn more independence in my classroom.

Changes are happening at church (which is also sort of my work). We're starting a new year- kids in new classes, new schedules, new teachers, Wednesday night church, etc. I've actually been missing a lot of these things lately which means I know I'm ready to jump back in with both feet.

Changes are happening with my friends. Getting married, getting engaged, having babies. I am so happy to be a part of all these experiences with them and look forward to more of it happening in the next year.

Changes are happening with MY life. I've thought and prayed a lot about what my next step in life is. Where do I go? What do I do? I've told God, give me a direction and I will follow. This song by Sidewalk Prophets describes my life perfectly right now. Even if it scares me or worries me, I will trust that God is leading me. I'm preparing myself to leave Seattle next summer and move back to California and attend grad school. School? Work? Friends? Church? All of those things are up in the air, but I feel okay about it.

A few days ago I was reading Ann Voskamp and she was writing about how God has provided every plant and tree and fruit we would need, but it doesn't start out that way. Things start out small, like a seed. She prays, Lord, what would happen today if I saw all the not-enough, too-little in my life to be but a seed? All the hardly-things could be holy-things -- small somethings You are growing into more glory for You. Cause me to believe again: All feasts begin as a seed.

Wow. What if I saw my life this way also. All the small things that I think don't matter. All the frustrating moments where things don't go my way. My kiddos at work are these seeds. My plans for the future are still seeds. My life is merely but a seed at this point, growing into the feast that God has planned for me from the start. Today, I am thankful for the seeds.

Undeserving Love

After reading Ann Voskamp's book, One Thousand Gifts, a few years ago I have been trying to be much more intentional about finding things in my life that I am thankful for. To tell you the truth, its hard not to find things that I am thankful for! Once you start looking you realize that there is more to be thankful for than not and that life is really much better than we ever would deserve. Thank you Jesus for your blessings even when we fall short of deserving them.

At church today we watch an episode from this series called What's in the Bible? and it was all about King David and King Solomon (talk about some guys who really didn't deserve God's grace!). These are always tricky stories to teach to elementary school kids...What do you mean he had more than one wife? Why did he kill that man? Isn't David a man after God's own heart? Does that mean it's okay for us to do that stuff too? (Okay so maybe a kindergartner wouldn't ask some of those questions, but a 3rd or 4th grader? Absolutely.) I am always so impressed with this series because they don't gloss over anything and are still able to tell it in a kid appropriate way. For example, this episode talks about David committing adultery, which means he stole someone else's wife. And then to cover up that adultery he had someone killed, or committed murder. BUT they also explained that he repented, asked God to forgive him, and wanted a clean heart (Psalm 51). While God still loves us when we sin or make bad choices, that doesn't mean there won't be consequences. If we lie to our boss, God will still love us but we might lose our job. If we hurt a friend, God will still love us, but that person might not trust us to be their friend...etc.

What a great way to describe these stories in a kid-friendly way. Just because God will always forgive us and always love us doesn't mean it is okay to hurt someone or do something God told us not to. We must also suffer the consequences of our actions. In the end we talked about which king we would want to be like, David who repented? or Solomon who turned away from God?

Neither of these kings deserved God's love or mercy, just like we don't deserve it either. I can't even wrap my mind around these kinds of things. Why does God keep loving us crazy people who continually do stupid things? I am thankful for these examples of people who lived before us. I am thankful that I have the opportunity to repent when I make poor choices. And I am thankful that God is always there and is always faithful. Most of the time I'm not even able to describe what it means that God is faithful, but there is a peace about it, that I know everything will be okay. I know that I am not responsible for planning my future alone. I have the ultimate designer and creator guiding my future.

"You are my God, and I will give thanks to you; you are my God; I will extol you. Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; for his steadfast love endures forever!" Psalm 118:28-29

Lazy Sunday Afternoon

Things I love about Sunday:

• My ritual of listening to worship music on Pandora while I get ready in the morning
• The sound of an excited "Hi Miss Emily!"
• Catching up with people after a busy week
• Singing with the kids
• Chatting with a puppet about Jesus and things we can learn from Him
• Problem solving when something doesn't run smoothly
• Sitting in the back of the church foyer chatting with a mom and their baby who doesn't want to be in the nursery (or quietly sit through the service)
• Seeing happy kids leaving KidTown, excited to come back again
• Taking naps on the couch

Things I love about THIS Sunday:

• The comfort of gray skies and rain that is still coming down, making the earth a lovely shade of green
• New curriculum to teach the K-3 kids
• Lunch with my brother at Orrapin on Queen Anne
• Chocolate Chip Brownie Cookies
• Laying on the couch and reading my newest book, Just a Minute by Wess Stafford

Praising the Lord for all that is good and right on this Sabbath day.

"I say to the Lord, 'You are my Lord; apart from you I have no good thing.' Therefore my heart is glad and my tongue rejoices; my body will also rest secure." 

Psalm 16:2,9

Easter Blessings

        Easter has recently become one of my favorite holidays. (I know I say that about every holiday, but this year Easter has been especially meaningful for me.) Yesterday we celebrated the Easter EGGstravaganza at the church with almost 100 kids! A very fun day of pancakes, egg hunting, crafts, bounce house, games, and a puppet show. This year I had the opportunity to host the puppet show and it was great. Working with our puppets is always fun, especially when they start ad-libing. I definitely had to keep from laughing a few times! The main message was based off m&ms.... Miracle of Mercy, Worthy of Worship, Eternal Life for Everyone, and 3 days in the tomb (or God is 3 in one). If you keep turning a package of m&ms they'll become w's, e's, and 3's. The kids were a little mesmerized by that idea, but I think the parents thought it was clever. It was such a joy to watch the children's faces as they enjoyed the puppet show and hopefully learned something about Jesus!

        Easter is a holiday that I haven't been home for in over 5 years. It was always right after spring break so it didn't make sense to travel back to California for such a short weekend. I have spent this holiday in many ways, with various family members and friends, but one thing that has been consistent is my opportunity to worship at First Free Methodist Church on this special morning. I have been reflecting lately on how blessed I am to be surrounded by a community that loves and cares for me as one of their own. Whether it is through a hug or a kind word, I know that there are many people who care for me (and whom I care for as well). I may not have friends who are my age or who are in a similar life situation, but the beauty of community is that it can be made out of any group of people who are intentional about loving each other and living life together. Better yet, living life together with the common purpose of loving Jesus and following him daily.

Christ is risen.

He is risen indeed, Alleluia!

No more school for me!

At Disneyland with my love
last Monday, 9/24/12,
NOT starting school with
everyone else :)

Today marked the start of week #2 of fall quarter at SPU and I'm not there! Well, I'm still sort of there because I'm working across the street, but I'm not actually there. I've driven through campus on my way to and from work and thought about how grateful I am to be done with school, but also how thankful I am for all the experiences I had at Seattle Pacific. Tonight I was thinking about all the students who will be eating dinner in Gwinn and all the nights I would walk over with all the girls on my floor for dinner. When I drive by in the mornings I think about all the times I rolled out of bed and barely made it to my 8am class on time. I look at all the sleepy students wandering around and wonder what classes they're going to and if they have any of my favorite professors. College was a wonderful experience and it's certainly bittersweet thinking back on it (even though it was only just a few months ago!). The "sweet" part is that I have no homework! No papers to write, no late nights trying to get through endless chapters of reading, no more sitting through gen. ed. mandatory classes. The "bitter" part is a bit harder to deal with...I miss my roomies so much and the wonderful memories we have made. I miss running into people I know and care about. I miss chatting with professors after class. I actually miss having a crazy schedule and filling in my calendar with different things every week. Change is always hard, but I am blessed to have had such a wonderful college chapter in my life!

Last Wednesday night we had our first "Dinner Church" of the year and it was so fun to be back in the routine! We had a full house of kids and it was great to see them all so excited for the new things they would be learning. After playing in the gym we sat in a big circle and I had everyone say their name, grade, and favorite subject in school. When it was my turn I said that I was graduated from college which means I'm all done with school and one kid said, "Whoa! That means you're a grown up!" I laughed and said that I was kind of a grown up, sort of an in-between/almost grown up type person :) A 2nd grade girl gasped and said, "You're a grown up! Do you have a boyfriend?!" I chuckled and tried not to turn too red when I replied "Well, yes....." All the kids started giggling and the girls were rapid-fire asking me questions: What's his name? Is he cute? Where is he? How did you meet him?.....After regaining everyone's attention I told them that we weren't talking about that right now and that it was time to line up for class! haha Oh how I love the kids I work with. The lesson series we're doing this fall has to do with friendship and I'm excited for all the things that we'll be learning on Wednesday nights. Not to mention the fact that we just started practicing for the Christmas musical on Sunday!! I love kids Christmas music! Probably a bit more than I should.... :)

The Last Few Months...

My computer is working again!! I have the best boyfriend in the whole world. He took my laptop apart and fixed it with his magic technology fixing skills. I am now backing up my files (after a slight panic that I would lose everything in my computer) and enjoying being able to do all the things that a smart phone and iPad cannot do. The last few months have flown by with a whirlwind of activities, everything from graduating and weddings to beach trips and working full time. Here is a glimpse at life lately for me...

Ivy Cutting with President Eaton, followed the next day with graduation at  Key Arena - 6/8/12

4 years and 2 degrees later, I am officially an SPU alum!

I spent my summer Fridays at FFMC helping out with "Mom & Me" story times. So fun to spend time with these little ones and their moms!

Wedding #1 Hannah & Nate's lovely wedding in Sandpoint, Idaho - 7/14/12

Luke and I had the opportunity to go to the Mariner's game and sit in the owner's booth with Mr. & Mrs. Davis! Mr. Davis threw out the first pitch to celebrate the Mariner's 35th anniversary.

No summer would be complete without a trip to the beach with these lovely ladies. So glad we were able to do this while I was home!

Wedding #2 this summer :) Esther's beautiful wedding in San Diego - 8/18/12

Love this girl!

Janelle and I got to practice our cake cutting and catching skills. We're going to see how many weddings we can cut the cake for :) I love that I get to have this girl as my roommate once again!

Last but not least, I came back from a vacation at home to a week of VBS- my first at FFMC. Such a fun week! Here are some of the highlights...

All in all, life is grand. I'm excited for this next season of life. Post-college with a great roomie, a wonderful man in my life, and not just one but two jobs I thoroughly enjoy. The best part is that it's all happening during my favorite time of year. Bring on the scarves, boots, and pumpkin spice lattes!

Time

Do you ever feel like there isn't enough time in a day? I suppose a better question would be- do I use the time I have been given to be as productive as possible? There are many days when I go to bed and wish I could have gotten more things done. I am 55 days away from graduating from college and it can't come soon enough! I have this hope that when I'm done with school I will have more time to get things done because I won't have homework to do, but I know deep down that I will still want more time. There are people I want to spend time with, books I want to read, blogs I want to look at, things I want to pin, movies I want to watch, shows I want to catch up on....oh to have an afternoon to be bored with nothing to do! Between school, work, church, and having some sort of social life the evenings at home by myself are few and far between. But I love it that way. I know myself and if I wasn't so busy I wouldn't be as happy as I am. I have never been happier than I am right now. I am so blessed in a million little ways- I couldn't even name them all. BUT I want to be a better steward of the time that God has given me. I want to be more organized, (how many calendars and lists can one girl have?!) so I can somehow get all the things done that I want to. I know that this means I sometimes have to say no to things, and that's okay! I just have to keep reminding myself that. For now, that means shutting my computer down and going to bed on time. Tomorrow morning: yoga day 1. Here's praying it goes well!

Is it Thanksgiving yet?

November has FLOWN by! I feel like the more I cross off to-do lists the more I add to them. It's never ending. haha. I am very excited for a break from school, but I know that I also have a lot of work to get done over the next week. Praying I'll be able to get things done even at home.

Last night at church Pastor Blake shared stories of thankfulness and how we all have things to be thankful for- even small things that might seem silly. He shared 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18:

Be joyful always;

Pray continually;

Give thanks in ALL circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus.

This was such a good reminder to me that there is always something to be thankful for. We are not called to only give thanks when things are going well and everything is happy, but in ALL circumstances we are to give thanks. When its pouring rain and I've dropped my notebook in a puddle what can I give thanks for? That I have the ability to go inside and warm up and dry off; that I have legs that work to get me out of the rain; that I can afford an education; that I am able to put letters and words together to even write that paper; that I have access to water all the time and don't live in a desert... (you get the point). There was poster paper throughout the sanctuary and we were invited to write things we are thankful for. I started making a list of things that often get forgotten in my daily life.Things like safety, security, clean water, education, salvation, grace, warm clothes, clean bedding, a car with gas in it....the list really is never ending.

Continuing my November list of daily gifts/blessings/thanks from God:
8. drama-free roommates
9. professors and pastors who want the best for me
10. a job that allows me to rest when I'm sick
11. boyfriends who adore their girlfriends
12. Christmas shopping
13. children caring about others in need
14. roommates coming "home" after being gone forever!
15. sharing embarrassing stories with trustworthy friends
16. blessings words can't explain
17. Thanksgiving food made with love
18. surprises from my favorite people
19. Christmas sales
20. FM1 worship & dinner
21. the feeling of finishing a big assignment

In other news, my roomies surprised me for my 21st birthday with dinner at PF Changs. So fun!

My life would be incomplete without these ladies.

Blessed.

I feel like I haven't blogged in forever! And there are so many things I want to say, but it all boils down to one statement: I am blessed. There are so many things in my life that are blessing me right now I don't even know where to begin.
I am blessed by my church and all the people there. I truly am part of a family and I absolutely love that feeling. I love knowing I will be at church at least twice a week, maybe more, and get to see so many awesome people in my life.

I am blessed by my roommates. All of us have come from different past roommate situations and we have all had different struggles, but this year just feels so right. We are all totally on the same page in so many different areas, it makes living together such a blessing. We were even talking about it last night and how we love coming home and doing things together. I love them all.

I am blessed by school. Even though getting up at 8am is not exactly my favorite thing in the whole world, I am so glad to go to class once I am awake. In my "Gender in the Global Context" class I am learning things about women all over the world who struggle and overcome all odds to gain freedom from so many different areas. It is inspiring to know what is going on outside of my little bubble here at SPU and in the United States. I am thankful for my Theology Capstone class where we spend 2 hours each week talking about our gifts, struggles, goals, trials, and everything else in between. It has become something I always look forward to.

I am blessed by the Falconettes (a women's service group on campus). We had our retreat this past weekend and it was so great getting to know more ladies who have a heart for serving their community. I am blessed by the times we spend together each week and the friendships I already see developing.

I am blessed by my family at home who supports me no matter what. I am blessed by the relationships that have started developing with family members I have never really known before. And I am so excited to go home for Thanksgiving to a house full of people.

"Every good and perfect gift is from above, coming down from the Father of the heavenly lights, who does not change like the shifting shadows." James 1:17

One more week.

I have been in Seattle one whole week already and only have one left before I can finally move into my apartment!! Two roomies are already there and I am counting down the days until I can be there too! It is slightly weird to be staying in someone else's [huge] house, by myself, with practically nothing to do when I'm here. Here are some things that have been keeping me busy lately:

Internship stuff! I have been getting curriculum together, making copies, running up three flights of stairs to get to KidTown (only to return to the office remembering something important I forgot), teaching Sunday School, directing kids & parents to new locations, meeting new people, getting lots of coffee, and more.

Driving back and forth and back and forth across the 520 bridge.

AND, last but not least:

Listening to Lady A's newest CD :)

Along with some babysitting, seeing friends, moving the brother into SU, and watching HIMYM, I am pretty much just hanging around. Next week will be busier because I will be back at work on top of church. I feel like I'm waiting for an airplane to take off: hurry up and wait. It's all in God's timing right? Gotta rely on Him when I get antsy :)