Thankful for the seeds.

Ch-ch-ch-changes are happening and I am choosing to be thankful. I am not the first person to admit to liking change or even welcoming it without a fight, but I am learning {finally} that change is a part of life and I can't do much to stop it. The first change is that summer is coming to a close. Boo. However, that means there are lots of wonderful things about fall coming....pumpkin spice lattes, scarves, boots, beautiful leaves, scented candles, my birthday, Thanksgiving, and eventually Christmas! Many stores already have their Christmas things out for sale, and while I think it is a little early, it does make me excited for my favorite time of year.

Changes are happening at work. We've just graduated 13 (mostly) potty-trained kiddos to the next classroom and are getting 9 (not potty-trained) new ones on Wednesday. I am preparing myself for the work that is ahead, but I'm excited for a fresh start and new kiddos who are excited to learn more independence in my classroom.

Changes are happening at church (which is also sort of my work). We're starting a new year- kids in new classes, new schedules, new teachers, Wednesday night church, etc. I've actually been missing a lot of these things lately which means I know I'm ready to jump back in with both feet.

Changes are happening with my friends. Getting married, getting engaged, having babies. I am so happy to be a part of all these experiences with them and look forward to more of it happening in the next year.

Changes are happening with MY life. I've thought and prayed a lot about what my next step in life is. Where do I go? What do I do? I've told God, give me a direction and I will follow. This song by Sidewalk Prophets describes my life perfectly right now. Even if it scares me or worries me, I will trust that God is leading me. I'm preparing myself to leave Seattle next summer and move back to California and attend grad school. School? Work? Friends? Church? All of those things are up in the air, but I feel okay about it.

A few days ago I was reading Ann Voskamp and she was writing about how God has provided every plant and tree and fruit we would need, but it doesn't start out that way. Things start out small, like a seed. She prays, Lord, what would happen today if I saw all the not-enough, too-little in my life to be but a seed? All the hardly-things could be holy-things -- small somethings You are growing into more glory for You. Cause me to believe again: All feasts begin as a seed.

Wow. What if I saw my life this way also. All the small things that I think don't matter. All the frustrating moments where things don't go my way. My kiddos at work are these seeds. My plans for the future are still seeds. My life is merely but a seed at this point, growing into the feast that God has planned for me from the start. Today, I am thankful for the seeds.

Undeserving Love

After reading Ann Voskamp's book, One Thousand Gifts, a few years ago I have been trying to be much more intentional about finding things in my life that I am thankful for. To tell you the truth, its hard not to find things that I am thankful for! Once you start looking you realize that there is more to be thankful for than not and that life is really much better than we ever would deserve. Thank you Jesus for your blessings even when we fall short of deserving them.

At church today we watch an episode from this series called What's in the Bible? and it was all about King David and King Solomon (talk about some guys who really didn't deserve God's grace!). These are always tricky stories to teach to elementary school kids...What do you mean he had more than one wife? Why did he kill that man? Isn't David a man after God's own heart? Does that mean it's okay for us to do that stuff too? (Okay so maybe a kindergartner wouldn't ask some of those questions, but a 3rd or 4th grader? Absolutely.) I am always so impressed with this series because they don't gloss over anything and are still able to tell it in a kid appropriate way. For example, this episode talks about David committing adultery, which means he stole someone else's wife. And then to cover up that adultery he had someone killed, or committed murder. BUT they also explained that he repented, asked God to forgive him, and wanted a clean heart (Psalm 51). While God still loves us when we sin or make bad choices, that doesn't mean there won't be consequences. If we lie to our boss, God will still love us but we might lose our job. If we hurt a friend, God will still love us, but that person might not trust us to be their friend...etc.

What a great way to describe these stories in a kid-friendly way. Just because God will always forgive us and always love us doesn't mean it is okay to hurt someone or do something God told us not to. We must also suffer the consequences of our actions. In the end we talked about which king we would want to be like, David who repented? or Solomon who turned away from God?

Neither of these kings deserved God's love or mercy, just like we don't deserve it either. I can't even wrap my mind around these kinds of things. Why does God keep loving us crazy people who continually do stupid things? I am thankful for these examples of people who lived before us. I am thankful that I have the opportunity to repent when I make poor choices. And I am thankful that God is always there and is always faithful. Most of the time I'm not even able to describe what it means that God is faithful, but there is a peace about it, that I know everything will be okay. I know that I am not responsible for planning my future alone. I have the ultimate designer and creator guiding my future.

"You are my God, and I will give thanks to you; you are my God; I will extol you. Oh give thanks to the Lord, for he is good; for his steadfast love endures forever!" Psalm 118:28-29

Finding Joy

November Blessings Part 3:
19. Yummy Thanksgiving food for lunch at work.
20. Parents who truly care for their children and are concerned with what is in the child's best interest.
21. My almond sugar cookie recipe :)
22. Spending Thanksgiving with a great family. I'm thankful for my family back at home too. Such a blessing to have 2 loving families in my life.
23. Playing fun games with fun people.
24. Waking up early and getting a lot accomplished.
25. Beautiful Christmas music.
26. Being taken care of when I'm sick.
27. A 2 year old wanting to say a prayer for his mommy and the "baby in mommy's tummy!"
28. People who truly appreciate things you work really hard on.
29. A bombardment of hugs, love, and "Emily!!" screams from a few special 2 year olds who I've missed a lot lately....guess they missed me too :)
30. Feeling well enough to go out and see a funny play.

After stumbling upon the book, One Thousand Gifts by Ann Voskamp a year or so ago and since I started following her blog, A Holy Experience, I have thought a lot more about what it means to count blessings and find joy in every aspect of life. There are gifts, both big and small, surrounding us every day, and sometimes I need that gentle reminder to stop and see all the ways in which I have been truly blessed.

Ann has created a calendar that helps give a little direction when it comes to counting blessings- things like 3 white gifts, 3 gifts of hope, a gift bringing laughter, etc. She made it for 2012, but I'm going to try and use it in 2013 (starting with this December). Maybe she'll come up with a new one for 2013, but for now my plan is to follow this calendar of  joy dares.

If we all found joy in each day the world would become a much more lovely place to be.